Before finally having the time to sit down and pen what is expected to be a cheesy write-up from a woman who's still over the moon, I had prior ideas of how to phrase all these wonderful feelings and experiences of how it is to finally tie the knot with your better half. However, words escape me now. How can one possibly clearly describe that profoundly amazing feeling of unadulterated love and bliss?
For those who happened to read the first two parts of this “pseudo-nobela” series, (http://www.sunstar.com.ph/baguio/opinion/2011/10/02/brett-love-story-182725) you would know by now that I was the cynical one. It was a long-distance love affair that transcended oceans, mountains and deserts (literally). At first, it seemed alright and convenient. There was someone out there who gave those occasional sweet tugs at the heart without being burdened with the drama that sometimes inevitably came with having your significant other be a physical part of your regular routine.
However, there were always instances when I had to question the decisions I made with regard this commitment. That undeniable conundrum of letting yourself undergo a set-up that would require a lot, sometimes even more than what you think you can give, in order for things to supposedly work out. But yes we survived. We managed to make do with online dating (http://www.sunstar.com.ph/baguio/opinion/2013/02/03/brett-love-story-part-ii-266289), seeing each other once a year, while equipping ourselves with tons of patience, extra understanding and whipping in all those other necessary ingredients to make the equation hold us together. It is difficult. It is not at all easy to stay unwavering in a romantic relationship where you can't even get to touch one's hand.
Yet somehow, we endured and we pulled through. Throughout all those years of odds and tears and oscillations, we tied the knot and are now secure and contented with the thought that we have an entire lifetime to make up for those lengthy eons of virtual love affair.
Well this is not the love story where endings always go with, "and they lived happily ever after" right after the guy marries the girl. We all want that. A sappy writer like me would want to end this piece with that as well. But I have to be honest. It's back to making video calls and messaging our best allies once again. He's back in his coasts and I'm back here in desert city. Although we both know that this is a temporary set-up and we'll work towards that time when we'll finally have an eternity to wake up next to each other, it appears to be harder being separated this time.
This is not new to us considering we’ve braved such a relationship for years together. But there are just some days that I tend to be wrought with emotions because of the frustration that this distance is causing us. It is harsh but this time around, I’d like to think that we both have that lucid sense of contentment—elation in the fact that our bond is sealed.
I no longer am a cynic. I’ve had my fair share of getting my heart broken and breaking other people’s hearts as well. I thought fate was just being brutally playful by making me fall in love with a person who cannot even take me out for a date at a chicken balls’ stand. But life does throw curve balls every now and then and sometimes, you just have to stop being expectant and prepared for consequent things. You stop analyzing and being logical and you just swing back with what you have that very instant. Once you hit that curved ball, you hope. We had that, and we will forever have that. Hope.
There are still humongous obstacles to leap but we took that one big step already. In our own not-so-conventional way, this is the start of our challenging but achievable happily ever after. Here’s to all those hearts that beat across distances!